TCT’s Hollywood Interview #27

…with B. Morris Allen

The Cartesian Theatre still welcomes guests from around the worldosphere, with an invitation to tell us all about themselves – in 25 words or less. Okay, okay, it’s not as bad as all that: they get 25 words per answer. They can wax lyrical if they want, but beware: I edit with an axe…

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This week, let’s give a big hand to B. Morris Allen, spec-fic writer and helmsman of Metaphorosis, a Kafka-inspired spec-fic magazine that seeks out “beautifully written stories for adults” (and it clearly finds them, since I’ve got one in it!).

Hi, Morris, tell us “all” about yourself.

I’m a middle-aged, planned-to-be veterinarian ex-biochemist vegan lawyer who grew up overseas and likes to read. It was all Serious Literature until I found Barsoom.

Ooof, I think the rules got bent with all that hyphenation. Well, tell us “all” about Metaphorosis – what’s going on there?

Metaphorosis is all about the writing. The writers I most admire are those with a poetry, grace, and inventiveness to their language: Vance, Zelazny, MacKilip…

What made you start your own online genre magazine?

Frustration. There’s a lot of good work published these days, but some that makes me wonder why and how. Metaphorosis only has the good stuff.

If only one person was to ever read Metaphorosis – who would you want it to be?

My uncle’s mother. She introduced him to science fiction, and he introduced me. It would be fun if she could read something she inspired and—

TOO LONG — and nothing ends a family get-together quite like JACK’S AXE!

So, currently you’re running a Kickstarter campaign – what’s the goal?

Longevity, as there will be a point when I can’t fund the magazine myself any more. Plus, the Kickstarter campaign can help build the audience.

What is the most inspirational book you’ve ever read – and why?

If Only They Could Talk, by James Herriot – because… it made me think about animals in a whole different way; not just as pets, but as a community of thinking, feeling beings and equals.

What are you most proud of in your life, outside of Metaphorosis?

In law school, I and a couple of others started the world’s first law journal on animal law. It’s still running today, and quite successful.

What is the thing you would most like to do with your life – but don’t dare?

I’m doing it. Metaphorosis was long in the dreaming, but it’s turned out better than I hoped.

Or owning a castle. Or both. Why not?

Okay, so what are your plans for the future of Metaphorosis?

I took time off to start the magazine, now I’m going back to work for it. Offering contributors professional rates is the true long-term goal.

Okay, my thanks to Morris for not buckling under the pressure! You can read Metaphorosis Magazine for free, but it also has a Patreon Page for those who like to support the online arts. And check out the Kickstarter, the campaign is going well with plenty of time still to run!

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TCT’s Hollywood Interview #26

…with Rory Stamp

The Cartesian Theatre now welcomes guests from around the worldosphere, with an invitation to tell us all about themselves – in 25 words or less. Okay, okay, it’s not as bad as all that: they get 25 words per answer. They can wax lyrical if they want, but beware: I edit with an axe…

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This week, let’s give a big hand to Rory Stamp, a horrific dairy bigot, bad poet and, er, massive-selling children’s author.

Hi, Rory, tell us “all” about yourself.

I am a writer and editor – currently with the Royal National Lifeboat Institution, the charity that saves lives at sea. I dislike Stilton cheese.

What? You freak. What is the most inspirational thing you’ve ever read – and why?

Dominic by William Steig (who also wrote Shrek), because… it’s a simple but beautifully written set of scenes powerful enough to make you believe in karma, despite life’s unfairness.

Shrek was a book? What was your first published work?

I guess a poem in an anthology that no-one bought, called Rare Window. It was pretty bad, looking back. Not as bad as Stilton though.

Leave the cheese out of it. What is the best thing you’ve never had published?

A screenplay about a kid who’s brilliant with tech but is fought over by gangs, security agencies and his family. Should be a book.

What are you most proud of – in your life, not just your writing?

My daughters. They make me feel lucky, proud, and brave. I’d do anything for them, including eating Stilton.

IYou— look, just tell us about your latest work – novel, short story, shopping list, whatever.

A personalisable Christmas book for children called The Big Christmas Rescue, a tie-in for the RNLI. It’s sold over 17,000 copies the last I heard.

Wow, that’s about… five hundred times more than all my books put together! So, pitch us your unwritten masterpiece – you’re in the Hollywood elevator now…

Soldier starts new life in country, becomes postman and Mountain Rescue volunteer, finds corrupt officials and gangsters, uncovers them, rescues hostages, saves day.

If only one person was to ever read your work – who would you want it to be?

Keith Richards – because I just like the idea of him reading my stuff … saying my sentences in his head with his perma-stoned drawl and random chuckle. Brilliant.

What are your plans for the future – all of it?

To look back knowing my words impacted lives. Even if it’s just proving Stilton is “off” cheese that we’re conned into treating as a delicacy.

In spite of his despicable anti-blue cheese stance, my thanks to Rory for not buckling under the pressure! You can find out more about Rory on Twitter where he goes by @LifeboatRory, and maybe he’ll come back again one day, more under relaxed circumstances…

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TCT’s Hollywood Interview #25

…with Clive Lane

The Cartesian Theatre now welcomes guests from around the worldosphere, with an invitation to tell us all about themselves – in 25 words or less. Okay, okay, it’s not as bad as all that: they get 25 words per answer. They can wax lyrical if they want, but beware: I edit with an axe…

HollywoodInteview
This week, let’s give a big hand to Clive Lane, part of a talented, hands-on, multi-cultural group of film makers working out of Madrid, Spain.

Hi, Clive, tell us “all” about yourself.

I write for, perform in and co-produce short films for the Wicked Tongues label. I also write short plays.

Okay, now tell us “all” about Wicked Tongues – what’s going on there?

We’re making short comedy films, with an international flavour, taking a dark and unsentimental look at modern life.

What made you start Wicked Tongues in particular?

I asked my diary three years ago what would make me happy and I came up with film-making. It does!

Okay then, pitch us the story of one of your short films.

Mechanical: a comedy where two hipsters break up but decide to have sex one last time – no Barry White, just a cold, itch-scratching encounter, only—

TOO LONG, CLIVE! Too long! Is this how it ends?

What is the most inspirational thing you’ve ever read – and why?

I think Impro by Keith Johnstone was written for drama teachers, but it’s an entertaining look at story-telling, creativity and human behaviour.

If you could say anything at all to your personal hero, what would it be?

I struggle to think of a personal hero, but I want to know what makes people bad/mad/sad, and how they accommodate their demons.

What are you most proud of in your life outside of Wicked Tongues?

I’m also a teacher and used to think I’d under-achieved. Now I appreciate how it has changed me, made me less selfish and more grounded.

What is the thing you would most like to do with your life – but don’t dare?

I’d enjoy the human test of politics. The best ones try to combine leadership qualities, with personal principles and day to day pragmatism. Nearly impossible!

So what are your actual plans for the future – all of it?

I have written a full length screenplay with my co-writer, Miriam Foley. I want to make it, and for it to be successful. Easy, right?

Okay, my thanks to Clive for not buckling under the pressure (apart from when he got too into that bad sex…)! You can find out more about Wicked Tongues from their site, and maybe he’ll come back again one day, more under relaxed circumstances…

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OFF-TOPIC: you may not know this, but your charming host is in the midst of a Kickstarter campaign right now — he’s the editor of ECOTONES, a great anthology of ecological fantasy and science fiction. Check out our site and the campaign page if you’d like to know more…